A Second Response to Feminism

My post before this was a response to a blog of a local friend (Madi) who has posted thoughts on her sexist experience in the workplace.  After my response, I received a couple criticisms that motivated me to think things through even more! 

Here is the link to her blog: http://madistandsupandout.com/to-be-their-secretary-i-dont-think-so/#comment-81

Here is my response:


     I’m not attacking Madi nor invalidating her experience; I’m disagreeing with her interpretation of her experiences.  It is not a male-dominated society that she fights, but a normal social phenomenon of group identity that has a tendency towards biased opinions.  This is culture.  My complaint is that modern feminism increases this identity bias, and seeks to solve this illusion of masculine oppression through mass political action.  But political action against whom?  Are we really raging a civil war against the Male CEOs and the majority male population in political leadership?   Who is the enemy here?  Men?  Or culture?  Men are not inherently evil, just as women are not.  I am not inherently biased because I am a male, just as Madi is not inherently biased because she is a female.  Thus, we are solving a cultural problem, not a man problem.  Culture can be resolved through dialogue, which is what I’m trying to encourage here.
     My thesis is this:  Running a society based on interpreted experiences that are validated by identity will only perpetuate a problem that feminists often claim to be fighting against.
Madi conquered a hard situation, and it's very respectable.  But she devalues her experience by saying, “...and thus another evidence that woman must fight against the male suppression!”  There are high numbers of women claiming sexual harassment, sex-biased job-placement, and lower pay due to simply being a female under a male boss, supervisor, or a male-majority workplace that is prejudiced against them.  This can clearly be seen here: http://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2017/12/14/gender-discrimination-comes-in-many-forms-for-todays-working-women/
But this is an anecdotal fallacy: meaning that just because someone thinks he or she is experiencing something, doesn’t make it valid evidence.  Even if 47% of all women in the workplace claim to have been sexually harassed, or discriminated against in some way, it does not validate their experience.  Just because the 80% of the Pharisees claimed that Jesus was an oppressive blasphemer doesn’t validate their point.   
     The greatest evidence that males continue to be biased against women would be the wage gap.  The source I previously provided shows that claim to be exaggerated and ultimately inconclusive.  But even if there still is a 1% wage gap, then we still see that modern feminism does not need affirmative action: they just need to be open to dialogue, just as the men do.  I am as susceptible to bias as you, but the way to overcome it is through dialogue.  That is the difference between modern society and the Guayaki Indians.  That is the difference between Socrates and the Athenians who made him drink poison.
In its greatest virtue, modern feminism continues to bring the awareness of possible subconscious bias that both males can have of women and that women can have of themselves.  However, as the sources I previously shared show, the natural differences and tendencies of the sexes are still under investigation, so even in a perfectly free state, women may never be 50-50 represented in business leadership and political positions.  They simply may not choose to do so.  That does not mean, however, we should not strive for a perfectly sovereign government… but that’s another discussion.
Madi should be getting a little mad about what she went through!  She may have experienced sexism on a micro scale, but not the white-male-dominated-society sexism that radical liberals seem to claim.  She says that this experience was specifically more sexist than any other work experience she has had and that the cause was the build-up of hundreds/thousands of years of women’s oppression that has become second-nature to males.  It seems that over the centuries both females and males had grown so accustomed to the usual role of the feminine women that for her to be politically active or in the business world was not only unheard of but was publicly acknowledged as taboo.  This changed with academic writings such as that of Simone de Beauvoir, and women’s suffrage movements in the 1800’s that brought awareness and united women in a common cause for liberty and representation in government.  But, if women were able to wake up from the dream of divine feminity, then wouldn’t men also be able to wake up from the dream as well?  Simone argued that no, since men enjoyed their cultural standing as the center of historical attention, with women as the supporting actress.  Not only that, but men were in control of the resources, so naturally they would want to give up control of the economy.  But that brings up classic conflict theory: that money, wealth, power, and security are the basis for human actions.  That is the basis for communism, and also the basis for the idea of the male-dominated hierarchy. 
But Madi did not write this blog because she is seeking wealth or power; she is writing because it is meaningful to her because it helps her organize her thoughts and share her experiences to encourage others to speak out.  Similarly, I am just an online English teacher who has a passion for social psychology, and I found an opportunity here to organize my thoughts!  Anyway, I’m pretty dang broke.  I’m not arguing my point to stay in power, I’m arguing my point because modern feminism attempts to make men evil, and assumes that male-hierarchy continues to pervade modern society.  I argue against Madi because we should not assume that sexism is such an issue that women are pervasively being economically oppressed.  That attitude can lead to oppressive attitudes towards men, and develop a false idea of utopia, and how that utopia is to be achieved.
There is no empirical evidence to support modern male dominance.  The surveys of women who purport to have sexist experiences in the workplace suggest that sexism is still prevalent; however, the multivariate analysis of the gender wage gap shows that this claim errs towards confirmation bias; a bias that is based on the group identity of the women.  #MeToo.
     Still, in support of Madi, I suggest that if it was sexism that she faced, then her battle was not against the male-hierarchy, but was more of a high-school musical scenario, where she was battling the current status quo on a small scale.  Men and women alike categorize themselves into groups based on commonalities in beliefs, preferences, talents, etc.  And, those groups grow close-knit, and develop inside jokes, and, like any other group that finds a commonality between them, will distinguish between us and them.  This can make entering a new workplace especially difficult.  This is not a good thing!  Groups, once formed, can naturally act in a marginalizing, derogatory way.  Do women do something similar when they gather together?  Sure.  Again, high school is a great example of this:  when a girl moves up the social hierarchy, it's only natural to defend her position, even if that requires publicly humiliating opposition or using friendship to guarantee a leadership position (such as on a sports team).  Of course, that is wrong as well, but what we have identified is a social action that every individual is susceptible to!  This is not historical phenomena, its a human, psycho-social phenomena. 
     In our situation, this social oppression will only increase if it’s assumed that “others cannot understand what I’m going through”, or someone’s opinion is marked as invalid simply because they are a man or a woman.  Don’t invalidate me just because I’m a man.  Please answer some of my argument, I’m open to being wrong, but please be willing to walk me through it. 

A Response to Feminism

A friend from highschool posted about her struggles at work, and blamed it on the male-dominated company.  To see this post, click here.

In response, I wrote the following.  I'm happy to hear any feedback, if someone actually reads this and decides to respond! 



Hey Madi!
It’s Lucas, long time no see!  I guess since Topham’s class you really made your talent shine, whereas I became a bit more of an academic haha.  While your story is good, but I wonder if it’s actually woman suppression in your workplace, or maybe it’s just confirmation bias.  Through your story, I see a girl who worked hard and was assertive and is becoming successful, despite the challenges of starting at a new company.  I do not see the male-dominated hierarchical oppression that you claim here.  I argue against you because, if there were actually oppression going on, the question arises, what is to be done about it?  And many modern feminists demand government involvement.  Government involvement in the workplace is inherently violent, and I believe there are better ways to change the workplace: through open dialogue.  Dialogue is what changes oppressive culture in a democracy like the one we live in.  If you want things to change, make it known to other people, and then they can boycott companies, or at least put their money somewhere else.  Or, it doesn’t have to be so extreme, maybe it just takes awareness, and then people change themselves.
However, to avoid government involvement in your situation and situations like it, or to avoid an unnecessary boycott against this company, I am arguing that your blog displays confirmation bias, rather than actual “woman oppression”. 
     A quote from you: “I was excited to finally be working in the field I loved. But guess what? I was then the marketing secretary – making schedules and running errands for the team. Gee thanks.”
Are you sure that’s not just the process of working up in the company or are you really going to blame it on you being a woman?  You were assertive, clearly showing you wanted a position change better suited to your skills… and then you got it!  You were assertive and enduring, just like everyone needs to be to be successful.  else.  I did something similar when I starting working for a big construction company, taking out the trash, filling up the water jugs, all the “chores”.  That is fine, it sucks, but it's a part of moving my way up in the company and waiting for opportunities.  I don't blame it on me being a boy, and you shouldn’t blame it on being a girl.  Is there a bias against girls?  Perhaps, but there need be better examples than what you have presented.
     It’s awesome that you got the pay raise!  Did you pay raise come from you showing them that you were worth more to the company?  Or did they give you the raise because you played the legal, feminist card?  If it’s the former, congrats!  If it's the latter, then you use the government as a big authoritarian brother to force them to change.  Are you so sure that’s a power you want prevalent in your community, the overhanging threat of governance if anyone looks like they’re marginalizing woman?  That seems like a fear society to me, not a democracy. 
     They fired you because you got pregnant.  That seems super messed up...unless the company doesn’t have enough to support you while you are away with a child.  If you are able to work while still spending sufficient time with the child, then great!  But if you are suggesting that they support your labor expenses while you’re away, then doesn’t that put the company, and thus the other employers, at risk?  Of course, if the company is financially stable enough, and your skillset is so valuable to the company, then why wouldn’t they want to keep you and support you at this critical time?  But should the government force them to support you?  That would make any small company fearful to hire women at all!  Thus, I think child labor laws oppress women more than modern males currently do. 
     But if the company is stable, then they should have the decency to work out an arrangement that works for both you and them, and not to just fire you without proper consultation.  But even then, I hope you have a family or a community to support you when times get hard.  If your skills are truly marketable and valuable, then further opportunities will arise (which they did).
     I'm not denying past woman oppression.  But I am arguing that sexism is not the problem modern day second-wave feminists claim it is. 
     In your epilogue, you say that it goes to show that talent shines, despite it being a “male” employee who hired you.  Careful, because I should not be objectively criticized for being a male, nor should your company be shamed for being a majority male.  Do guys act differently when they are in big groups?  I think so.  But so do women.  Should these cultural norms stop?  At some points, yes.  But I don’t think there is an inherent oppression in your situation that is denying you progression in your career. 
     Your statistic that women earn 75 cents to every dollar in the workplace is inaccurate.  You pulled the statistic from CNN.  Careful of doing that, since CNN, FOX, and other big news stations today are naturally biased.  It’s best to do research before spreading claims that there is a need for another mass, government-supported women’s liberation campaign.  Here is a multivaried analysis of the wage gap: http://www.aei.org/publication/the-gender-wage-gap-myth/, which shows how the statistic should not be taken as a “our country is sexist!”  The source I just gave you shows that maybe there still could remain a 5% wage gap to be explained.  Despite obvious factors, such as women getting pregnant and taking time away from work, or to house-wives that work lower-paying, less "take work home" jobs, or a large majority of woman preferring nursing or education jobs, consider this source: https://heterodoxacademy.org/the-google-memo-what-does-the-research-say-about-gender-differences/ where they do a great meta-analysis of why the idea of 50-50 of women and men in the workplace is, or may not be, justified.  It presents both sides very fairly, unbiased, and reaches no conclusion.  All I’m trying to show is that to say “Did you know women only earn 75% of the man’s dollar nationwide?!?” is an oversimplified, exaggerated claim that can have dangerous implications. 
      Sorry, I’m not trying to beat you down, I’m just analyzing your work.  I do have another question for you.  At the beginning, you said, ”Being the raging feminist that I am, I was STOKED to bring some femininity to the office.”  What is femininity to you?  And how can it help the video-making, marketing industry?  Perhaps your experiences you could provide a valuable perspective on creating a product for large or smaller sub-cultures of women.  But does femininity really help the company?  How so?
       Great job on the writing and good luck with the future videos!  I bet your videos are awesome just by sheer years sticking with it.  I’ll look forward to your response unless I’m just a big jerk…. Then you can either ignore me or just let me have it ;)

An Atmosphere for Creativity

My opinion of Professor Kabamba Thesis of Capitalism

It is true that we are all affected by the social structure of capitalism--that productivity defines our success. But there is a doubt-worthy portion of that idea, and that is the existence of creativity. Sure, we may have become an alienated, objectified people--but in God’s eyes, we are also creators, producers, igniters of ideas and exploring them. While relationships are so important, perhaps enlightenment (Gandhi, Buddha), also known as internal peace, is just as correlated with the possibility of creativity as it is with our relationships.

So what is creativity? It's our ability to doubt the world around us, and if doubt isn’t a good word for faith-based audience, then question the world around you. It is our ability to find a better path, and to believe that if baldly labeled people had a better opportunity to do good, they would take it. It is also accepted that if they had a well wrapped opportunity to do bad, they may take it as well. Therefore, to create a better world, and believing that at least 50% of humanity has that good inside them, I will live my life to reach out to those people.

I also do find fault with the communism of the aboriginal, because although they may not have prolonged stress like we do, they also don’t have deadlines like we do. And deadlines give us the opportunity to either say “SCrew it!” and find better things, or to also rise up to invent new ideas and implement them. ANd I’m sorry to say that the professor’s right, we do often look to make money on those ideas (after all, that is how we have to live), and it is to our detriment that we seek compensation from all the good things we do and the good things in this world--so much so that we can fall in the trap of not having enough. However, if our hearts accept the economy as primarily a social network of ideas and inspiration, and secondly a source of basic necessities, then our world becomes a better place to live… thus this mindset can be the solution to bosses that are less strict on productivity, the solution for businessman to allow employees to make more time to be with their families--because the world isn’t about profit, it's about growth and relationships--and that doesn’t come from a product, it comes from spreading an original idea.

And that is the solution to a society run by the dollar sign: an environment for creativity and the courage to implement of those ideas.

Love Is Suffering

     Everything I do is potentially to feel good. Therefore, everything I do is selfish. I eat cause i'm hungry, I sleep cause I'm tired. Even if I serve someone else, I do it for the good feeling and self-satisfaction that comes from the act. No one can deny we feel good when we serve others. So what is it that takes us from the selfish realm into one that is unselfish?
     It is our capacity to feel pain for another person. Why? Because like a mother carries the burden of a child, only if we are willing to suffer with another person is it more than selfish.  To be a truly good person, I have to suffer. The Book of Mormon is full of examples of good people who suffer. Lehi suffers anguish of soul for the rebellion of his sons, as does Nephi for his brothers. Alma suffers through "much tribulation of spirit" on behalf of his people.  Mormon himself watches with anguish and cries out for his fallen people. That is because he loved them.
    This makes Jesus Christ the greatest example of love of all time, for he bore all our afflictions. This to serve us. He put us above his own personal feelings of spiritual and physical peace.

sidenote: this also shows that detachment can never be a part of Christianity. Once can dedicate himself to the work away from earthly cares, but to detach from family relationships like a monk is not Godlike. It conquer desire, but removes the greatest suffering, the family. Therefore, Buddhism is limited on its capacity to love. Buddha did not cry when his father or friends died, but Christ cried when his friend died.  Logically, like Buddha saw, "decay is inherent in all componet things", so why stress about the family? However, Buddha also knew that some suffering is necessary for growth. Through Jesus Christ we can achieve the peaceful unattachment of Buddhism while mainting the joyful relationship of the family.
      The modern world seems to avoid having children within the bonds of marriage. Perhaps because it seems to expensive, time consuming, basically too much stress..  But those who live it know, that the greatest suffering comes from kids, and becomes the greatest growth. We are limited in our capacity to carry a burden with someone, or it at least remains untested, until we have a family of our own.

Self-Mastery and My Dog

Sheldon is tied to a propane tank on the front lawn. I want to let him go free, because I know he'd feel better being released from his leash. But I can't let him, he'd run off and get himself hurt. He'd bark at the neighbors and be a nuisance. So I keep him in the front yard or locked in the house until he learns manners.
     Sheldon wants to run, and bark, maybe even play with other dogs. I can tell he's bored sitting there, but he's also learning a valuable lesson if he'll pay attention. Sometimes he's so calm, just thinking. About what, idk. But he is learning to enjoy the calm.
     I am like the dog, and God is my master. Sometimes oh how much I want to be free from bondage. I want a good job, oh how I want to bless my friends and be an example to them. I want health and the means to help others have health. I want wisdom to guide my family. So why does God keep me, as well as so many others, tied to a leash?
     I not only protect my dog when I keep him tied up, but I am being considerate of others. So God ties me up to protect me, to teach me the smell of the flowers, and to teach me how to be around people. I should not bark at them or bite them, but I should show them the same love I show my owner. Then I would be free from my leash, as long as I keep being obedient to my master.

     So what are the lessons I must learn to be released off my leash? I must learn respect of others. I must develop self control, else my master will not trust me. And once I have been properly trained and disciplined, then will the leash come off, and I find myself free to roam within the bounds my master sets, which is much better than a leash. I still have protection, but I get to see new places and love more people. Because I am trained, I get to wander here and there and enjoy myself, and then sprint in response to my master's call.
      That's life, and rages within whatever setting we find ourselves in. Perhaps a disability can feel like a leash, yet the resurrection will cut us loose. And then, if we have learned to obey our masters call, we will come into him and be saved. And this life is a symbol of that, for just as the Nephites or the children of Israel, God prospereth his people according to their righteousness. The younger we learn the commandments, the more blessed are we, for we will run with the wind and enjoy, more fully, time spent with our master.

A Good Person Doesn't Dwell on Her Own Goodness - Lao Tzu

A genuinely good person doesn't always have the best reasons or motivations to do good things. She doesn't find a have a reason to serve others, or listen, or to be interested in others success. It is simply a part of her nature, because she's naturally attracted to happiness.

How Can I be Selfless?

     Selfishness is buying a cake for yourself. Selflessness is buying a cake for yourself and another person. Genuinely caring about another person in all you do, even the small decisions, is the 180 degree difference that makes you selfless.

     Those who are interested in service act
          without motive.
     Those who are interested in righteousness
          act with motives of all sorts.

             - The Tao Te Ching of Lao Tzu #38                  

   
      How can I be unselfish while doing the things I love? Life should be lived as a Dad wants for his kids: to be talented, have new experiences, to establish a foundation for righteousness. Every choice is will translate to what you teach your kids. What new experiences have you had lately? Have you made any new friends today? Are you growing in talents? Live as you would have your child live, and you begin to live an unselfish adventure.